Entries Tagged as 'National'

Tuesday, April 29th, 2008

Bush Offers Nation Change from Floor of Car

Washington – Seeking to address the worsening U.S. financial crisis, President Bush said today that the nation could have the 52 cents he found on the floor of one of several armored limousines used for presidential travel. “I was going to use it to get some chewing gum or something like that,” Mr. Bush said [...]

Friday, March 28th, 2008

CIA Inadvertently Destroys Two Senators

General Michael V. Hayden, director of the Central Intelligence Agency, testified on Capitol Hill today that the CIA “inadvertently destroyed two senators” who were at the agency’s headquarters in Langley, Virginia to hold a meeting with him.

Monday, March 17th, 2008

Bush Urges Nation to Wait for Rich Uncle to Call and Offer Large Cash Gift

Hoping to defend himself against criticism that his administration hasn’t done enough to help average Americans who are struggling financially, President Bush met with Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and several other economic advisers at the White House today.

Wednesday, March 12th, 2008

Study Finds Lifelong Link Between Bush, Flawed Intelligence

A Pentagon-sponsored study to be released Friday has found that President Bush has relied on deeply flawed intelligence since his birth.

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

Navy Shoots Down Errant Butterfly

Military officials said today that the United States Navy’s shootdown of an errant butterfly was a “complete success.”

Tuesday, February 26th, 2008

Bush’s Location Undisclosed to Bush

President Bush’s Secret Service detail did not inform him of his own location until after they had safely left that location.

Thursday, September 13th, 2007

President Attempts to Distract Country With Puppet Show

Washington - In a nationally televised address tonight, President Bush attempted to distract a country concerned with the war in Iraq by performing a one-man puppet show.
“My fellow Americans, tonight I bring you good news,” Bush said. He then reached under his desk and pulled out two puppets, one red, one blue. He put one [...]