Jerome Calls for National Jerome Awareness Week

Pasadena, CA – Fame-seeking Pasadena resident and National Protrusion editor Jerome Halligan called today for a National Jerome Awareness Week, where people across the United States would become aware of him in some way. Jerome proposed that the week begin on Monday, March 2nd, and continue until that Friday. “You can take the weekend off, I suppose,” he said.

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Jerome Halligan addressed the nation from his home office to ask for participation in National Jerome Awareness Week.

In a national address given to his home computer, Jerome said, “I call today for Americans across the country, and Americans that might be on vacation somewhere other than America, to come together and begin to recognize Jerome Halligan. If you haven’t been aware of him before, take this week to become aware of him. It is vital to your knowledge of Jerome Halligan. It is vital.”

Jerome said that without a week dedicated to increased awareness of Jerome Halligan, millions of Americans would continue to be unaware for the foreseeable future, and that was unacceptable. As it is, he said, too few people are aware.

“I can count on three or four hands, if I had that many, how many people are aware of Jerome Halligan,” he said. “And that is not acceptable to me. I want to run out of hands. I want there to be so many hands needed to count all the people that know me that I say, ‘My God, where will I get all these hands?’ And I think it’s possible to get there.”

As to why people should make themselves aware of him, Jerome said, “I represent what is truly American about America. I have very little money, I have a large ego and I want millions of people to know who I am, though I can’t really put my finger on exactly why.” Jerome said that he works incredibly hard running the The National Protrusion, and on various other projects “with varying levels of brilliance.” But none of these have yet made him famous. “And that,” he says, “Is a goddamn shame.”